A Little Bag of Sidewalk Chalk

FINALCOLLAGEService Play Groups, a long held dream, became a reality this summer!

FINALGLOBELet me be honest, I struggled. We had over three hundred families express interest on our facebook page, and I fielded email questions in abundance. Our first week we had a large group, but every week after the group was small. My first thought was that people attended the first week, hated it and didn’t come back. This is what my mind does. It was the depth of summer, and people are so busy. The timing was to open the door for whole families to come, but probably would have been better started a little later and not so close to dinner time. I was worried the families that attended would be disappointed with the small groups. I went home every night and worried instead of feeling joy.

FINALLISA

I share this because whenever you put yourself out there you face vulnerability.

The enemy really loves for us to get into our heads and tell ourselves we are not good enough. It’s my life-long fight.

He wants us to fixate on things like numbers that are completely irrelevant to the kingdom of God. Want to know why?

because then we don’t look at all the small, hidden beauty he offers us.

 

Like…

FINALSUPPORTINGCOLLAGE

The fact that a dream became a reality! We gave over one hundred welcome and birthday bags to Holland Rescue Mission, a trunkful of high-need supplies to Community Action House, a bicycle to a girl to access education through World Vision, two sets of vaccinations to a child through Shot@Life, and seven fruit tree seedlings for families in Bangladesh through World Renew. We were able to use the books donated to us by Citizen Kids Books!

 

FINALJODI

Many wonderful partnership were grown and will be forever friendships. There are many like-minded people in our communities and world, we need to fight to bring them together. We will be continuing into the forever future. Connect with our facebook page, or talk to myself or Jodi Baron! We would LOVE to partner with you. We have some exciting ideas taking shape for this coming year.

FINALFAMILIES

 

All the sweet families who took the time to attend and give. I appreciate you all so much. And so many young people were able to be leaders and guide stations for younger kids! It was so great to watch. All the kids were so wise and insightful during the stories. Kids understand justice so beautifully. We can make such a difference when we come together.

 

 

We needed a significant amount of supplies to launch service play groups. My parents invested in this dream by purchasing all the supplies. They helped me load them up and clean up every single week. All while my Mom is going through a tedious time of treatment for cancer. I am thankful and humbled by the fact that they still support my dreams.

FINALPETERSENFinally…

Every week children would drift into our play group area. They were alone, no families, sometimes siblings. They came from the community, some from the park and others from our neighborhood church. They added a great deal to our time together. There was one little boy, who asked to take some sidewalk chalk home because he didn’t have any. My friend Jen tied some up in a plastic bag for him and he happily went on his way that evening.

As I watched him walk into the distance, after a thirty-six year battle with not feeling good enough, I let it go with that one bag of sidewalk chalk.

FINALCHALK

The world tells us:

perfection, the bigger the better, stronger. you need to be popular, dynamic, numbers are everything.

But not feeling good enough makes it about me, and its not. It just really is not. God is going to use your dreams, and absolutely everything you do for his good, regardless of your weaknesses and perceived failures.

When you are not feeling good enough…

look for what is there, like a little bag of sidewalk chalk.

 

That is beauty. That is making a difference.

And we are going to keep doing it.

 

Enough

enough

 

perfection:

the condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects.

 

I ran into the lawn mower in our garage this winter and now it is busted. busted.

I wear clinical strength deodorant. clinical.

I never make my bed. never.

Sometimes I feel totally overwhelmed. totally.

I always leave the laundry until Sunday. always.

Awkward. I feel this way always.

Not good enough. I feel this way always.

 

Perfection. Trying always.

Reading that definition. Why do we do that to ourselves?

It is not happening. Ever.

 

His grace is enough. It really is when I slow down long enough to think about it.

It is sufficient. Everything we need.

 

Love to you this Monday.

It Means Something

riskOne of the most beautiful experiences of writing has been the friendships I have made. Amy Sullivan is wickedly smart, talented with words, and welcomes with open arms and kindness. She gathered up a group of bloggers to join in her #riskrejection challenge this January.

Click here to see Amy’s first risk and read all the link-ups.

 

I am not a risk-taker. Mainly, because I hate rejection. Rejection, the word makes me want to hide in my bed, covers pulled over my head. People pleasers don’t embrace rejection.

Risking rejection scares me. Something funny has happened every time I have done it. Something stronger emerges deep inside me. I feel God’s arms wrap around me. His relief, you trust me. Life is short. Going deeper, reaching further, listening and not ignoring his voice makes these moments mean something.

 

I have three risks to share with you.

My first is a simple word that departs from my mouth very slowly.

The word is no. This word scares me, because I feel like its recipient will forever hate me. Maybe, it’s more that I will hate myself for not being able to do it all, for not being perfect, for messing up.

This fall, I committed to helping with Wednesday night nursery at my church. I also took a new day job and am writing a curriculum in the evenings. This semester, I need to admit that I can’t do it. Everything, I can’t do. I want to do everything. I can’t. It’s being honest and trusting that others will honor that. It’s not hating myself for everything I can’t do.

This is a little risk. A little word. Big to me and my heart.

 

Please come back next Friday. I will share a rejection that I’m willing to try again.

What has risking rejection meant in your life?

What has emerged after you took that leap of faith?